Monday, August 5, 2013

All Aboard

Here we go again - about to hop on the train as it leaves the station.  Tomorrow is my baseline appointment.  This is the appointment where they'll check that everything looks good to go before I start my stims for this final (I make no promises, but I really think I mean it) egg retrieval.

This is also the appointment where we must pay for the full cost of this IVF cycle.  For those who wonder really really how much it costs to go through a full IVF cycle, I'll lay it out for you.

On Tuesday we'll be paying, out of pocket:

  • $11,906 - this covers the full IVF (ICSI, Assisted Hatching, Fresh Transfer, Ultrasounds etc) and is with a self-pay discount
  • $763 -  anesthesia 

For this cycle we have already paid, out of pocket:

  • $3164.52 - for my meds
  • $7.93 - for Ian's meds
  • We saved just under $900 because of leftover meds from a previous cycle. We could end up spending more if we need refills on anything.

This does not include the costs of any of the testing we did between last cycle and this.  This also does not include the cost for freezing any leftover embryos.  Of course if this cycle does not succeed, and we do have leftover embryos, each of those following transfers will cost $3099 as well as the cost of medications.  We won't even talk about how much more we'll have to come up with if none of this works and we start looking at adoption.  I'll save that for when/if we get there!

This is why my answer is now always a sad, "no" when you ask me if I have any vacations or travel planned.  (A slight lie, as we are planning to go to Australia to visit Ian's family this winter - we haven't been since July, 2010.)

In the meantime, I haven't gotten results back from my biopsy yet.  I know it can take a couple of weeks, and it is just two weeks today. I've done some research in the meantime on the benefits of the biopsy beyond potentially gathering some information.  Dr. Tran had mentioned that this procedure can sometimes help just itself by causing some cell regeneration in a some way that leads to higher rates of implantation in patients who have had repeated failures.  I didn't dig too deeply, but did find some anecdotal evidence that made me feel like I'm glad I did it, in spite of the pain.  I definitely want to walk away from this cycle, success or failure, feeling like I did everything I could.

The worst thing, though, is that I keep seeing it (and hearing it) referred to as "tickling" the lining.  It sounds so gross to me, and also FUCK YOU THAT DID NOT TICKLE.  Every time I see that term I want to vomit all over the place.  I've also seen it called "scratching" which is slightly more accurate, but still NO.  It is a horrific painful suctioning.  Don't sugar coat this shit.  I've had so many things inside of my vagina and uterus in the last year and a half and my bullshit radar is turned on high.  Calling it a tickle does not make it a tickle, guess what.

Anyhow.  I'll keep you posted as I move through this cycle.  All aboard!


  1. Woohoo! For the starting, not the insane amount of money you're about to lay down. Insanely good thoughts will be coming your way (I'll probably sprinkle some around at the clinic when I'm there for my apt on Thursday, just for good measure) ;)
    If you need extra meds, let me know. I have lots of leftovers that I was going to try to sell on the black market.

  2. Well, you could save $763 if you skip the anesthesia. Just saying...

    I love you both very much. I'm impressed by the thoughtful way you've continued to deal with such immense issues. Keeping you both in my thoughts and I'm here if you ever wanna talk.

  3. Tickling sounds like another form of "You're going to feel just a little bit of pressure here."

  4. I hope the biopsy gives you some answers, even if it's only to rule out what it isn't.

    It's worth asking if there's going to be a follow-up study to the one you did before. Having worked at a research institute, my impression is that getting previous study participants to come back for more research is kind-of the holy grail for study coordinators.

    1. Oops, that was me, Sophie (aka alamark on LJ)

  5. Shit a brick, dude. That's some expensive shit. Super happy you guys are making the time/space/dosh necessary to head back to Oz for a family visit. Hopefully it will be a bit of a relaxing time for you, unlike your awful sicky-la-la holiday last time!

    Love how you say that your bullshit radar is turned on high :) Funny how your writing always makes me smile, even through all this. Okay, so not always... but you're a funny lady, y'know? x