Thursday, August 22, 2013

The Bros

The transfer went very well!  We found that all 12 embryos had survived until day 3, and we had 6 that Dr. Tran considered excellent (based on number of cells, uniformity of cells, and fragmentation).  This is in comparison to 1 or 2 in our last cycle that were of similar quality.  The other 6 vary from slightly less amazing down to not very good looking, and although I saw all the numbers, it was too much to take in and I just don't remember (I also might've been a little valium drunk at the time).

So, we transferred the best 3 and in my uterus they now reside, hopefully settling in!  Well, hopefully they aren't *all* settling in, but 1 or 2 are welcome to settle in!

Here they are!  Henceforth referred to as "the triplets," "the bros," or maybe, just for my dad, "Huey, Duey and Louie."

I am feeling cautiously hopeful.  I was thinking about it, and there are quite a few things that have changed since the last cycle, that I'm hoping will increase our odds.

  1. Medicine Protocal - we switched up my meds hoping for higher quality eggs, and it seems like we got 'em.
  2. Hysteroscopy - I had that hysteroscopy, which I had almost forgotten about until looking back on the blog.  I don't know that it helped anything, but we did remove a tiny polyp and a tiny septum so can't hurt.
  3. Biopsy -  Had the delightful endometrial biopsy aka tickle that can help. 
  4. Number of embryos transferred - We transferred three embryos instead of two.
Keep all your fingers and toes crossed for me.

In the meantime, I just had a second post published on Kveller (literally they published it as I was working on this post).  This is a post that I am advertising less far and wide because it is, as Ian put it, a little grim.  I wrote it awhile ago, and there were many weeks (months even?) between when I wrote it and when it was posted on Kveller.  It is "A Letter to all the Pregnant Women in my Life", which I'm not 100% sure about any of the actual pregnant women in my life reading (or any women who might soon become pregnant).  Part of me is dying for you to all understand and still love me, and part of me is afraid that those two things are not actually both possible.  Alongside that dichotomy is the fear of making anyone that I care about feel bad or sad in any way.  That is so not my goal, now or ever.

So, all I can say is that it is up to you.  It is not rainbows and flowers.  It is pretty raw and full of things that you might not want to know about me, especially at this time in your lives.  So, I sort of leave it up to you to decide if you want to choose a little bit of completely understandable, acceptable and fair ignorance, or full knowledge.  As I say at the beginning of the post, "It's not you, it's me."  Hell, maybe I'm making it sound worse than it is.  Fear fear kick in the rear.

If you want to read it, here you go.


  1. All fingers and toes crossed! And the kittens are doing it too. GOOOOOOOO Huey, Louie and JEWEY!

  2. Good luck little dudes! Go, go go!

  3. I'm no day 3 expert, but those look like some beauties! Lots of luck and good wishes to you!

  4. Sending positive vibes to the little Dudes! Hang in there!

  5. WOW I love science! The fact that you have this picture is freaking amazing! Sticky thoughts, sticky thoughts...

    It's great that you wrote that piece. I can understand why you'd feel nervous about it, but as a woman who has been had a bubba while you guys have been going through this, it's nice to actually read the nitty gritty ouchy stuff that I KNOW is in there but nobody would dare (except our over-sharon!) to voice. It kind of opens it all up to the other women in your life too, so that we can understand you better... I am doing a terrible job of articulating my feelings about this, but while it was sad to read, it was also amazingly refreshing.